I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
