how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
