I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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