Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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