You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
