I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
he was CRYING into my vagina
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
