Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
