this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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