i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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