I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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