I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
