My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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