I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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