**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
