shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
