Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
