in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Panties = found
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
