wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
