He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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