I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
