is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
