Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
