Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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