So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
