You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
