Christians are straight up FREAKS
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
