never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
