he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
