Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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