My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize