Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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