I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
