Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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