Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I just want nice things and good sex
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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