I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
