So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
