Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
