absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
