why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
