Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Still dying that you shit outside
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
