So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
