my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
