its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
