I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
