which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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