should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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