i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I am available for nakedness
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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