are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize