is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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