yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize
